Miriam Quiambao moves on after divorce

She may have had great luck in beauty pageants, having been crowned the First Runner-up (to Miss Botswana) at the 1999 Miss Universe pageant in Trinidad-Tobago, but Miriam Quiambao isn’t quite that lucky in love—at least not with her first marriage.

Quiambao met Claudio Rondinelli in October 2002. He proposed marriage in September of 2003, and they wed on December 23, 2003 in Hong Kong, and in a sunset ceremony in Boracay on January 9, 2004.

In January this year, Miriam was finally granted a divorce, but not before having undergone severe depression.

During an interview on “Paparazzi” on Aug. 8, Quiambao refuted money issues as the cause of the split. “When we were married and we were happy, of course he spoiled me. Diyos ko, ang pasalubong nga niyan, Hermes scarf. Ganun siya ka-generous, ganyan siya ka-galante sa akin. He gave me a really good life. At saka hindi totoo na hindi siya mayaman, no… meron naman siyang Aston Martin sa Italy. He’s a jetsetter,” she said.

But then she points out, “Pero hindi ko naman din siya pinakasalan dahil sa yaman niya. Pinakasalan ko siya dahil in love talaga kami.”

But she said the marriage started to crumble when she had fallen into depression. She said, “Malungkot ako, I was away from family and friends... wala akong trabaho. So nahirapan talaga ako mag-adjust to married life. Sanay akong career woman, tapos naging housewife [ako]. Happy naman ako to serve him pero nalungkot ako kasi wala akong kakilala, lalo na sa Italy. He was always traveling.”

But the last straw was the fact that neither of them knew how to address the problem. “When we were really having a tough time, hindi talaga namin alam kung pano pag-usapan ‘yung mga problema. And yung intimacy namin, it’s not as if ‘yung connection talaga super deep and emotional. Kasi nung nagde-date kami, super saya nung experience namin… puro good time. Pero when the bad times came, hindi namin alam kung pano malampasan ‘yon.”

Claiming that while the problem was not really compounded by him not wanting children (“Ginusto rin naman niya magka-anak, kaya lang we just were not okay,” she said) nor physical abuse (“Hindi naman, sinaktan niya ako emotionally. May konting verbal abuse,” she admitted), her revelations about their intimacy issues clearly resonated with the female hosts of the show.

“Nung honeymoon pa lang namin, nagkakaroon na kami ng problems. In terms of intimacy,” she revealed.

In tears, she shared, “Basta nung honeymoon namin, hindi kami nag-consummate. And it stretched on for six months. I felt very neglected. Dumating sa realization ko ‘yung, ‘Oh my God, iniwan ko ‘yung career ko, lahat ng mga mahal ko sa buhay tapos ganito.’ ‘We didn’t know how to go through it, tahimik lang kami, hindi namin pinag-uusapan.

"I think it was because at the time when we got married, hindi talaga siya handa. And napilitan lang siya kasi he didn’t wanna let me go. Pinakasalan niya ako because he wanted me to be happy.”

Lamenting an absence of emotional connection, she also stated, “At a time when I was very depressed, I needed friends, in-introduce naman niya ako. Pero when I needed him, he wasn’t there for me emotionally. I needed to see a psychologist because I was wondering what was happening with me. And then I called him because the doctor said we should go through marital counseling. Actually ayaw niya… I really had to beg on the phone to please come and meet with the doctor with me. So kung hindi ako nag beg sa kanya, hindi pa siya pumunta.”

She was so unhappy that, in an interview with a broadsheet last May, she admitted contemplating suicide and that a third party caused the break-up. Both issues were not raised during the “Paparazzi” interview though.

But now that the divorce is final, Quiambao said she and Rondinelli have become friends. “Kasi ‘yun naman talaga ang goal ko, na after all this is over, at the very least we should be friends. So in February when I went to visit, we had lunch and we were okay.”

She said she even returned the Rolex watch that he had lent her. Jokingly, Gutierrez said she should not have done so. “Eh hindi naman talaga niya binibigay eh. So alangan naman i-keep ko yung hindi niya binibigay. So sinauli ko sa kanya. Parang pinaniniwalaan ko na lang na, ay nako bibigyan din ako ng trabaho ni God para maka-afford din ako ng Rolex,” Quiambao answered.

In another broadsheet write-up in January 2010, Quiambao was said to have admitted to a women’s health magazine that she was dating someone. Though the article did not mention any names, the piece heralded that Quiambao was “satisfied” about the divorce and that “annulment proceedings in the country [were] underway.”

Meanwhile, Rondinelli seemed to have moved on as well. “At the time we had lunch, meron na siyang dine-date,” Quiambao admitted. When asked if it affected her, she replied, “Hindi na, happy ako for him. And at least naman, ganito civil kami. Hindi kami ganon ka-friends na nagtatawagan every now and then, wala nang ganon. And there’s really no reason to talk to each other anymore.”

“The greatest lesson is to honor myself, my preferences and love myself first before I go into a relationship and love someone else,” she said of her experience.

When Gutierrez pointed out that her ex-husband didn’t seem to be the right man for her, Quiambao concurred. Gutierrez also kidded her about her seeming preference for men who lived in Hong Kong; however, it was unclear if the host meant the same guy that Quiambao was said to be dating in January.

However, to her joke, the beauty queen responded, “Oo nga, kasi taga-dun siya eh. He’s a really good man. Super sweet guy. And if he were living here or if I were living in Hong Kong, probably he could be a really good candidate. It’s just that he has a stable job there; he has no plans of moving here.”

Admitting to being traumatized about packing up and going to live in another country for love, Quiambao added, “Bukod doon, I have a realty business here, plus I’m trying to establish myself in showbiz once again.”

Gutierrez then pointed out that it would probably take more than just love to make Quiambao move to Hong Kong again with someone called “Vince.” To this Quiambao replied, “Nagawa ko na kasi ‘yun Rufa, eh. Parang mas gusto ko ‘yung guy naman ang taga-rito or lilipat dito for me. Naka-focus na lang ako sa trabaho.”

But through it all, Quiambao said she remains hopeful and would love to get married again. “Of course, wala pa akong mga anak. Gusto ko rin magka-anak at siyempre gusto ko magawa ‘yun within a marriage na happy ako…”

Source: MB